After the news that the IVF failed last week, the best thing I could do is to take a little break. I went to the house at the lake to spend time with my daughter. It was a difficult start to the week, but I am slowly feeling better:) I think this is because I've realized a couple of things....One- I'm not going to give up. Just because the doctor said it wouldn't work for me, doesn't mean I'm not going to try....and Two-this is the best time to appreciate what I already have and just enjoy every minute of every day with my beautiful daughter! (Even if she's going into her "Terrible Two's" and has been a pistol all week!) lol. In the end, everything has been worth it.
I still have the bad bruises on my stomach from the Lovenox. Purple, Black, Blue and Green! I look like I got mildly beat up on my tummy. Who know's how long that will take to go away?
I have my next appointment for another opinion on March 6th. I've been thinking about it a lot....maybe he'll just tell me the same thing? The doctor I went to made me feel that there were not any other options. How will I feel if I hear this news again? *Sigh* I just don't know...it will be frustrating I suppose. I know that most people think that since I have a child I shouldn't be worried about Infertility, or Sub-Fertility....but when you know how great it is and this is your full time job and you're told you may not have more of your own, it's very hard. I know many people don't even have one of their own and my hearts go out to those folks. I do honestly feel blessed for what I do have. Sometimes I ask myself if I'm being selfish for wanting another child? I even asked my husband that question the other day. His response to me was that it is OK to want something. He said that I shouldn't be so hard on myself because it is OK to want another child. It's just not up to us if it happens or not, so I still just have to focus on 1 day at a time.
I'll keep things posted as we move along in a couple of weeks! And then it looks like my husband and I might be able to take a much needed vacation, just to get away and enjoy each other! :)
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