After the news that the IVF failed last week, the best thing I could do is to take a little break. I went to the house at the lake to spend time with my daughter. It was a difficult start to the week, but I am slowly feeling better:) I think this is because I've realized a couple of things....One- I'm not going to give up. Just because the doctor said it wouldn't work for me, doesn't mean I'm not going to try....and Two-this is the best time to appreciate what I already have and just enjoy every minute of every day with my beautiful daughter! (Even if she's going into her "Terrible Two's" and has been a pistol all week!) lol. In the end, everything has been worth it.
I still have the bad bruises on my stomach from the Lovenox. Purple, Black, Blue and Green! I look like I got mildly beat up on my tummy. Who know's how long that will take to go away?
I have my next appointment for another opinion on March 6th. I've been thinking about it a lot....maybe he'll just tell me the same thing? The doctor I went to made me feel that there were not any other options. How will I feel if I hear this news again? *Sigh* I just don't know...it will be frustrating I suppose. I know that most people think that since I have a child I shouldn't be worried about Infertility, or Sub-Fertility....but when you know how great it is and this is your full time job and you're told you may not have more of your own, it's very hard. I know many people don't even have one of their own and my hearts go out to those folks. I do honestly feel blessed for what I do have. Sometimes I ask myself if I'm being selfish for wanting another child? I even asked my husband that question the other day. His response to me was that it is OK to want something. He said that I shouldn't be so hard on myself because it is OK to want another child. It's just not up to us if it happens or not, so I still just have to focus on 1 day at a time.
I'll keep things posted as we move along in a couple of weeks! And then it looks like my husband and I might be able to take a much needed vacation, just to get away and enjoy each other! :)
Showing posts with label IVF and Type 1 Diabetes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label IVF and Type 1 Diabetes. Show all posts
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
IVF Failed :(
I want to thank everyone who has taken the time to read my story...it may only be a few of you, but maybe more and I hope that someone has felt some sense of comfort in reading it, allowing them to know that they're not alone.
Unfortunately I won't be able to tell you how the progesterone shots effect my diabetes because we found out today that our second egg didn't fertilize. The doctor called me himself this morning...as soon as I answered and heard his voice instead of a nurse on the other end, I knew it wasn't good news. He said that our first egg, though mature, just didn't overall look like a good egg. Our second egg was intermediate on the day of retrieval and didn't mature until the next day. Eggs only have a 70% chance of being fertilized and it didn't happen. :(
So what are the next steps? Well the doctor has told me that since I didn't respond well to the high dose of IVF medications, that IVF probably isn't a good thing for me to try again. He says that chances of natural pregnancy are high after taking all of these medications, so to "Get On It!" over the next 2-4 months:) Ok, those were technically my words:) hehe. From that point, we could try IVF again, but the chances are so slim, that we may want to consider donor eggs. I can honestly say that I am not ready for that option.
I feel so blessed to have 1 child, that if that is all God gives me, then I will be happy. It's not that I can say I will be happy and satisfied right off the bat, but I know it will come with time.....
I have also decided that though the doctor may say I'm done, I'm NOT. I've already scheduled a second opinion. For all I know the doctor will say the same thing as the last doctor I went to, but at least I'm putting myself out there to try. If he says no too, then I will be able to figure out the next steps. The appointment isn't until March 6...which is 3 weeks away...but I promise to keep things posted as we move along in our Fertility Journey. Please feel free to comment or email me with any thoughts, questions, or just feelings. It is a Journey...that I will never take for granted, but take one day at a time:)
Unfortunately I won't be able to tell you how the progesterone shots effect my diabetes because we found out today that our second egg didn't fertilize. The doctor called me himself this morning...as soon as I answered and heard his voice instead of a nurse on the other end, I knew it wasn't good news. He said that our first egg, though mature, just didn't overall look like a good egg. Our second egg was intermediate on the day of retrieval and didn't mature until the next day. Eggs only have a 70% chance of being fertilized and it didn't happen. :(
So what are the next steps? Well the doctor has told me that since I didn't respond well to the high dose of IVF medications, that IVF probably isn't a good thing for me to try again. He says that chances of natural pregnancy are high after taking all of these medications, so to "Get On It!" over the next 2-4 months:) Ok, those were technically my words:) hehe. From that point, we could try IVF again, but the chances are so slim, that we may want to consider donor eggs. I can honestly say that I am not ready for that option.
I feel so blessed to have 1 child, that if that is all God gives me, then I will be happy. It's not that I can say I will be happy and satisfied right off the bat, but I know it will come with time.....
I have also decided that though the doctor may say I'm done, I'm NOT. I've already scheduled a second opinion. For all I know the doctor will say the same thing as the last doctor I went to, but at least I'm putting myself out there to try. If he says no too, then I will be able to figure out the next steps. The appointment isn't until March 6...which is 3 weeks away...but I promise to keep things posted as we move along in our Fertility Journey. Please feel free to comment or email me with any thoughts, questions, or just feelings. It is a Journey...that I will never take for granted, but take one day at a time:)
Monday, February 13, 2012
Final Decision- Move Forward with IVF
After careful consideration we have decided to move forward with IVF and not an IUI. We figured that we've come this far, right? If the doctor doesn't think that I will respond any better to future IVF meds, why not go for it? If I have to do it again and get less follicle growth, I'll probably regret not going for it when they said I had 3 decent ones! So now, we just pray that there are eggs in each of the 3 follicles and that they are mature. Then that they fertilize and grow! And of course from there that it implants and that we have a baby:) (but I'm pretty sure that was a good assumption of what we want) lol
I go in tomorrow morning for the retrieval. I took a shot of HCG last night. I have seen some mild insulin resistance, but nothing major. I feel like my insulin resistance is more coming from a lack of exercise. I haven't been to the gym since the end of last week. I've been keeping my CGM on and just monitoring my sugars really closely. I have also started taking Lovenox (a blood thinner) They started me on this Saturday night. I've had some bruising from it, but once again no major issues with blood sugar control.
Tonight was the first night I haven't had to give myself a shot in a couple of weeks! So nice! But more will start again tomorrow night as long as things go well. They just had me take a Pepcid to reduce the acid in my stomach today and tomorrow am, as well as Reglan. I'm not sure what the Reglan does. I will ask again tomorrow.
I go in at 8am in the morning and the procedure is at 9am. 30min-1hr with -2hrs of recovery time. Please keep your positive thoughts with us that all goes smoothly!
I go in tomorrow morning for the retrieval. I took a shot of HCG last night. I have seen some mild insulin resistance, but nothing major. I feel like my insulin resistance is more coming from a lack of exercise. I haven't been to the gym since the end of last week. I've been keeping my CGM on and just monitoring my sugars really closely. I have also started taking Lovenox (a blood thinner) They started me on this Saturday night. I've had some bruising from it, but once again no major issues with blood sugar control.
Tonight was the first night I haven't had to give myself a shot in a couple of weeks! So nice! But more will start again tomorrow night as long as things go well. They just had me take a Pepcid to reduce the acid in my stomach today and tomorrow am, as well as Reglan. I'm not sure what the Reglan does. I will ask again tomorrow.
I go in at 8am in the morning and the procedure is at 9am. 30min-1hr with -2hrs of recovery time. Please keep your positive thoughts with us that all goes smoothly!
Saturday, February 11, 2012
IVF or IUI?? Even Lower Follicle Count
Let me start off by saying that that Ganirelix is driving me nuts! lol...Ever since I have started taking it I go through a period of insulin resistance during the day. It's usually in the afternoon, after lunch. Where it would normally take me 3-4 units to get my sugar down, I am taking about 10+! This has just been while I have been on the Ganirelix. I mentioned this to the doctor today and he was surprised to hear this because the Ganirelix is just a LH prohibitor.(My LH won't rise so I won't ovulate early)
At my follow up appointment today we found out that I only have 3 follicles that have grown....I really wish it were more. Because of this the doctor has once again brought up the idea of doing an IUI instead. I have been pregnant before which the doctor says that I have in my favor. If I hadn't ever been pregnant before, he would say 100% do the IVF. But because I have, he is thinking that we might be better off doing an IUI (Artificial Insemination), but he is leaving it up to us. The biggest advantage of doing an IUI would be that we would get up to 50% or more of our money back...and if it didn't work, we could put that towards trying again starting in April. But there is still a chance that the follicles that I have produced have at least ONE viable egg in it! And after that there are more variables against us....Is the egg mature? Will the egg fertilize? Will it grow? So it's a big decision....what do we decide to do? We've come this far, do we just go all the way?! I have until tomorrow to decide......
At my follow up appointment today we found out that I only have 3 follicles that have grown....I really wish it were more. Because of this the doctor has once again brought up the idea of doing an IUI instead. I have been pregnant before which the doctor says that I have in my favor. If I hadn't ever been pregnant before, he would say 100% do the IVF. But because I have, he is thinking that we might be better off doing an IUI (Artificial Insemination), but he is leaving it up to us. The biggest advantage of doing an IUI would be that we would get up to 50% or more of our money back...and if it didn't work, we could put that towards trying again starting in April. But there is still a chance that the follicles that I have produced have at least ONE viable egg in it! And after that there are more variables against us....Is the egg mature? Will the egg fertilize? Will it grow? So it's a big decision....what do we decide to do? We've come this far, do we just go all the way?! I have until tomorrow to decide......
Monday, January 16, 2012
The Journey Begins....Why We Are Chosing IVF
This is a blog about being a Type 1 diabetic, getting pregnant and trying to get pregnant again...and hopefully it will be about being type 1 diabetic throughout pregnancy...everyone's story is a little different and this is me chronicling mine.
When I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes almost 27 years ago, I didn't at the time quite realize how diabetes would change my life, nor did I think about getting married, or even having children in the future. I just always assumed that because I had Type 1 diabetes, that I probably wouldn't have kids. Way back in the "olden" days, that's what you heard about Type 1 diabetics. I am happy to say that is one of the furthest things from the truth. It IS possible....but it doesn't mean that the path to get there was not and is not frustrating, and the whole process...sheesh! You think pregnancy is tough...add on being pre-gestational diabetic! It's a whole other world of frustration and worry....but it is possible to get through it!
So some people might look at this and think "IVF, that means you must deal with Infertility". In my case, no. My husband and I were diagnosed with "Sub Fertility". Almost 2 years ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. But that was after over a year of trying and going through surgery to remove endometriosis from my ovaries and slightly blocked tubes. After the surgery and another 4 months of trying we conceived naturally our beautiful baby girl. 3-4 months after having her we decided to go for the next one. Since that time we had 1 miscarriage (at 9 weeks), which was completely heartbreaking. No, it was devastating to me.
It's been just about a year now with no luck on conceiving again. This is where the doctors tell us that the "Sub Fertility" comes in. Thank goodness for decent medical insurance right now because we have gone through thousands of dollars worth of blood tests, immunology tests and fertility drugs. My FSH is over 10 (10.7 to be exact...and this was tested more than once), my 21 day progesterone is a little low (so they say it would make it hard to sustain a pregnancy) and some of my immunology tests were Mildly off (which means, potentially, that if I am getting pregnant naturally, it's possible that my body might be fighting off the pregnancy....seeing it as a forigen object) And oh yes! To top it off...my blood type is O negative....Rogam here I come! And fertility drugs....*sigh*. Those were even frustrating before I took them! Scared on what they were going to be doing to my insides, how they would make me act, wondering if this is too far out of the relm of not "natural"...and I haven't even gotten to the IVF drugs yet! We started with Clomid...and clomid alone. No success. Then we did another couple of rounds of Clomid with the HCG Trigger shot. (Watch out hormones! My poor husband....I was definitely not "non-emotional" throughout all of these processes). But once again, no success. So after multiple OBGYN's, blood tests, sperm tests and different opinions left and right we have decided to do IVF. Before coming to this decision for sure, we got the opinion of 2 different IVF doctors as well. They both agreed that I have Sub Fertility and that my Follicle count was lower than it should be for somebody my age. Here is a little time line of how things have gone:
Deciding to put myself through the process of IVF, especially because I'm a Type 1 Diabetic, definitely has me freaked out! Hormones, fluctuating sugars, moodiness...is this all what is going to happen to me?! Most importantly, how will this all effect my sugars? Also I wonder, am I just not being patient enough? Because we can get pregnant...we've proved that, but the docs say that with certain blood tests results that came back, failed IUI's, having had surgery for endometriosis, along with having diabetes for so long, that I should just go for it!
So OK, I'm going for it!! I've looked online and have tried to find websites/blogs with more info about being Type 1 diabetic and doing Invitro Fertilization. There are some, but I want to share how these drugs seem to effect me because of my diabetes! They may do nothing at all! But my purpose is to chronicle my fertility journey. I remember some things from before, but this will be a whole new adventure...and like they say, "no two pregnancies are ever the same!". So wish us luck, we start the first shots in about 8 days.... and here we go!!
When I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes almost 27 years ago, I didn't at the time quite realize how diabetes would change my life, nor did I think about getting married, or even having children in the future. I just always assumed that because I had Type 1 diabetes, that I probably wouldn't have kids. Way back in the "olden" days, that's what you heard about Type 1 diabetics. I am happy to say that is one of the furthest things from the truth. It IS possible....but it doesn't mean that the path to get there was not and is not frustrating, and the whole process...sheesh! You think pregnancy is tough...add on being pre-gestational diabetic! It's a whole other world of frustration and worry....but it is possible to get through it!
So some people might look at this and think "IVF, that means you must deal with Infertility". In my case, no. My husband and I were diagnosed with "Sub Fertility". Almost 2 years ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. But that was after over a year of trying and going through surgery to remove endometriosis from my ovaries and slightly blocked tubes. After the surgery and another 4 months of trying we conceived naturally our beautiful baby girl. 3-4 months after having her we decided to go for the next one. Since that time we had 1 miscarriage (at 9 weeks), which was completely heartbreaking. No, it was devastating to me.
It's been just about a year now with no luck on conceiving again. This is where the doctors tell us that the "Sub Fertility" comes in. Thank goodness for decent medical insurance right now because we have gone through thousands of dollars worth of blood tests, immunology tests and fertility drugs. My FSH is over 10 (10.7 to be exact...and this was tested more than once), my 21 day progesterone is a little low (so they say it would make it hard to sustain a pregnancy) and some of my immunology tests were Mildly off (which means, potentially, that if I am getting pregnant naturally, it's possible that my body might be fighting off the pregnancy....seeing it as a forigen object) And oh yes! To top it off...my blood type is O negative....Rogam here I come! And fertility drugs....*sigh*. Those were even frustrating before I took them! Scared on what they were going to be doing to my insides, how they would make me act, wondering if this is too far out of the relm of not "natural"...and I haven't even gotten to the IVF drugs yet! We started with Clomid...and clomid alone. No success. Then we did another couple of rounds of Clomid with the HCG Trigger shot. (Watch out hormones! My poor husband....I was definitely not "non-emotional" throughout all of these processes). But once again, no success. So after multiple OBGYN's, blood tests, sperm tests and different opinions left and right we have decided to do IVF. Before coming to this decision for sure, we got the opinion of 2 different IVF doctors as well. They both agreed that I have Sub Fertility and that my Follicle count was lower than it should be for somebody my age. Here is a little time line of how things have gone:
- July 2008- Started tying for a baby
- May 2009- Surgery for Endometriosis
- September 2009- Pregnant!!!!!
- May 2010- Delivered Healthy Baby Girl
- October 2010- Started Acupuncture with herbs
- December 2010-Pregnant
- December 2010- Severe allergic reaction to Medicine after conception
- Feb 2011- Miscarriage at 9 weeks
- August 2011- Begin Clomid 100mg- still doing Acupuncture and herbs throughout all
- September 2011-Tons of blood work. FSH 10.7
- September 2011- up Clomid to 150mg with IUI and HCG Trigger Shot and Progesterone Supplement
- September 2011- OBGYN suggests IVF after we get blood work back
- October 2011- Clomid again with 2 IUI's and 3 HCG trigger shots and Progesterone, Acupuncture and herbs
- October 2011-OBGYN suggests IVF again- have phone consult with IVF doctor
- November 2011- still not pregnant, Obgyn suggest IVF Again
- December 2011- FSH 10.7...Again
- Jan 2012- Still not pregnant...Starting Plan 1 of the IVF process. Still doing Acupuncture and herbs.
Deciding to put myself through the process of IVF, especially because I'm a Type 1 Diabetic, definitely has me freaked out! Hormones, fluctuating sugars, moodiness...is this all what is going to happen to me?! Most importantly, how will this all effect my sugars? Also I wonder, am I just not being patient enough? Because we can get pregnant...we've proved that, but the docs say that with certain blood tests results that came back, failed IUI's, having had surgery for endometriosis, along with having diabetes for so long, that I should just go for it!
So OK, I'm going for it!! I've looked online and have tried to find websites/blogs with more info about being Type 1 diabetic and doing Invitro Fertilization. There are some, but I want to share how these drugs seem to effect me because of my diabetes! They may do nothing at all! But my purpose is to chronicle my fertility journey. I remember some things from before, but this will be a whole new adventure...and like they say, "no two pregnancies are ever the same!". So wish us luck, we start the first shots in about 8 days.... and here we go!!
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